Me Love the Gym

Yesterday I was in such a good mood for most of the day. The vet had called in the early morning Thursday and advised that we could bring out dog home as his surgery recovery had gone well. I was looking forward to having him home. Then I got a call at work from the vet.. my heart sank at the very sight of the vet's number on caller I.D. Well, it seemed that the pup had a bout with some vomiting after eating one of his meals. Although, on the surface, no huge deal. But, the vet really thought it best to keep him another 24 hours to make sure. I first reaction was to tell them to f-off, I want my dog. But, reason got the best of me and I went along with the vet's recommendation. So, another puppy-less night! The good news is, he has not vomited since SO today should be the day! For those who might be reading and have never had a dog, this all probably seems trivial. The dog is a family member, period.
So, as I now had time in the evening and it appeared that storms were moving into the area that would prevent me from mowing the lawn (thank god, I hate mowing the lawn) I took advantage of the time and hit the gym. I really wasn't motivated to lift anything but was determined to make myself go through this ritual. Much to my excitement, the "perfect storm" of gym misfits and glamour queens were out in force. This makes it so much better at the gym as watching some of these folks is truly entertaining and makes for a great distraction in between sets.
The 50 yr old socialite - This lady is classic! At only about 5 feet tall and dark black hair down to her ass, she is all dressed in the latest workout fashions. All of which are very tight. I'll give her that she can kind of pull it off, but only because of the obvious "work" she has had done. Giant chest, an ass like a 16 yr old etc, etc. What makes her entertaining is her half assed approach to the actual workout and her keen attention to the dude that works at the gym. Hilarious to watch her look over her shoulder to see if he is watching her "lift."

She's got to be a Stripper - Well, this one... she knows you are looking at her. There simply is no way not too. Kind of like a solar eclipse, you just can't help yourself but to look. She is a guilty pleasure and I would be lying if I didn't admit she has a place in my "spank-bank." Always in tight black workout pants and ab showing sports bra she hits the workout pretty hard. Which is probably why she has the bod that she has. I figure that she had a tit-job and figured that she needed the body to match. And speaking of her tit-job, as she lays across a bench it is always a good idea to catch a peek ... like I said TRY AND LOOK AWAY...IMPOSSIBLE.

This is better the a singles bar dude - I rarely see this dude at the gym, but he was in full force last night. This guy is always dressed in the tightest fitting Under Armor shirt. Sporting a gold watch, chains, tats (or course the barbed wire tat around the bicep.. that's a whole other post for another day). True, he is bigger then me. I'm sure how as it doesn't appear that he picks more the a few weights up at any one visit to the gym. What's great about this dude is that you can literally see him strategically place himself in the most advantageous spots to strike up a conversation with any mildly attractive female. I think we all know this type of guy. The best was when he asked "stripper" girl if she "needed a spotter?" Now that takes a bit of sack to do. She declined. To be honest which is worse: his aggressive approach with "stripper," or my lingering in the shadows waiting to see if a nip-slip occurs? I'll let you be the judge on that one.

Crazy Grunt Guy - I see this guy every so often in the gym. He's the one that lets out wild grunts while lifting. Yes, I know lifting can be difficult, but seriously is all load grunting necessary? It is so great to see others reactions when this fuck yells out on one of his reps. You can just see the smirks and giggles from others. Message to this dude - if it is that heavy, you shouldn't be lifting it. And, when you grunt like that the ladies don't find it attractive. It only begs the question of what does this tard sound like when he takes a shit?

18 going on 30 - You have to be careful these days, the younger females all look a lot more mature then they are. Sure, they may look pretty good but a word to the wise, they probably are just getting toned up for prom. Delete all memories from spank-bank - perv.

I do have so many more, but I'll save them as I'm sure I will re-visit the topic at a future date as my life really isn't that interesting.

All for now... Hi Jen, my one and only reader!